2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
dude i'm inner monologue high
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
