I just cut my nipple shaving
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical