Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
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The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
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