im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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