tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
COCAINE IS GR8
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
