I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.