it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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