ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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