dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
