the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Randomize
