I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
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