the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
