I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
