you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize