Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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