Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Randomize
