I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
