DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow