Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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