I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
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It is, darling. Trust me.
That depends on how you were taking "care" of them, if you know what I mean.
It could be the "drunk" part of it. Or it could be the part where you're fuckin' delusional about your supposed cooking and caring skills. Look up "Dunning-Kruger Effect".
Just a guess but the whore in you probably cancels out your redeeming qualities.
no homo, but I'd marry you :\nP