I wish I could punch you in the face.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
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There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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