Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
this beer tastes like vomit already
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize