I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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