With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
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