Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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