I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Randomize