what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
