We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
