im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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