i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Randomize
