drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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