I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
