I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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