awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize