Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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