she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
