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  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 11:04am

    HA! Beer: helping ugly people get laid since 1847.

    • Submitted by sp1nnermann on Mar 8, 10 at 10:51pm

      im sure beer has been around longer

      • 49 60
        Submitted by JohnSinclair on Mar 28, 11 at 6:59pm

        Nah, that's when sex was invented.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 11:06am

    Way to stay off topic "diceman". The real Andrew Dice Clay will be over to kick your ass shortly.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 12:38pm

    I think my roommate does this to girls

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 11:07am

    And there isn't something in this post about him leaving with his balls kicked up to his larynx why???

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 6:00pm

    gotta love portland guys hahaha!!!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 5:11pm

    I immediately thought of Against Me! as well. I love them.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 11:09am

    Milk is a bad choice

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 1:52pm

    Totally have this on a necklace

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 11:06am

    yeaaaa classy man right there

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 11:08am

    THIS IS HYSTERICAL!!

  • 95 99
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 3, 10 at 3:33am

    I love this guy hahahahah

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 11:32am

    Wow....what a dick. He probably has a small one, too.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 5:35pm

    Oh I get it! It's funny because that is something very rude that you would say to someone who you did not hope to see again! -Jeff

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 2:06pm

    Pretty sure that's websters definition of a gentleman

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 11:11am

    "You Look Like I Need A Drink" is also the name of a good song by Against Me.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 10, 10 at 3:41pm

    I have this shirt...got laid in it 6 out of the 7 times I've worn it

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 12:24pm

    Oh wait, I fail. Didn't read it right

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 6, 09 at 3:18am

    what a good fucking song...

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 2:12pm

    Get that plastic surgery!!!!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 11:06am

    Seems pretty harsh to me.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 3:20pm

    LMFAO...SO FUKIN HILARIOUS

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 5, 09 at 9:41pm

    i sometimes wonder why people put "good night" to these

    • Submitted by baine5 on Feb 11, 10 at 9:34pm

      well she did get laid

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 12:15pm

    This is mad funny :D

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 11:51am

    Wooo 11:11 I'm glad I'm not the only one that thought of that. Against Me! FTW!!!!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 11:48am

    "Wanna know how I got these scars? Joker" I know it's just him being a douche, but this is actually apropos this time...

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 11:02am

    Old Mother Hubbard went to the cupboard To fetch her poor dog a bone But when she bent over, ROVER TOOK OVER! And gave her a bone of her own! DICEMAN

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 11:39am

    the girl should accept that she prolly looks like ground beef, and should be glad she got some. dude didnt have to clown her, but still, ugly people know they're ugly, it's not new information to them.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 11:40am

    One night stand "FAIL"!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 5, 09 at 6:44pm

    6:57 pm I love you. 5:35 pm If you're not a native English speaker, cool, but if you are, are you trying to be ironic or something?

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 12:14pm

    This text is funny...in America.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 1:12pm

    he said "this probably is the worst decision that I've ever made" she laughed and smiled, then said "i'm sure you do this all the time right right right RIGHT?" we all know where it went from there. Gotta love Against Me! I'm sure that dude was a fan.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 6:57pm

    11:04 Nice job copying a fucking keychain. Poor girl. Hopefuly the lay was alright.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 5, 09 at 4:36am

    No girl would actually send in a text that insulted herself like this. Its either fake, or the guy sent it in....which kind of makes him a dickwad on two levels, not just the one.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 2:32pm

    that's just wrong on so many levels lol

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 12:24pm

    Or maybe he needs a drink... Lol

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 11, 09 at 12:01am

    i dont know who you hooked up with but he is awesome

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 4:37pm

    What happens in 971?

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 12:16pm

    Hahahhahhahahahahahhaha....

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 1:04pm

    11:11 : exactly my thoughts!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 26, 10 at 2:23pm

    Confidence booster waddup

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 11:08am

    one of those "I'd rather chew my arm off than wake this person up" moments?

  • 59 75
    Submitted by KneeHigh on Dec 17, 10 at 11:00pm

    HA. That is some funny shit.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 11:26am

    That's really sad :( What a jerk.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 5, 09 at 3:18pm

    Definitely an against me! Song. Let the douche leave for trying to take credit for a good song.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 5, 09 at 12:48am

    Against Me! song was what I thought of. If a guy said that to me I'd be kinda happy he was probably an fan also. lol

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 5:14pm

    bahhhhhhhhhhhhh ha ah ha ha ooooh sucks to be her

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 12:24pm

    Much funnier when I read it right

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 6:22pm

    If I had a nickle.. -Bradon

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 12:08pm

    AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA thats f-n GREAT!!!!!

  • 40 66
    Submitted by crazyman217 on May 24, 11 at 5:18pm

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k_QDGdbg-QQ&feature=related

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 4, 09 at 6:37pm

    You are SOOO bummed!!

  • 44 83
    Submitted by JV33 on May 23, 10 at 6:04pm

    Hahahahahahahaha! If this actually happened that guy is legit!

  • 28 56
    Submitted by amypost8 on Dec 20, 11 at 2:46am

    Sucks to suck