Texts From Last Night

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  (914): View more from New York

  saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend

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  (914): saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend http://tfl.nu/5l48
  Replies (5) Good night (1467) Bad night (545)
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  (949): View more from California

  ...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail

  (949): View more from California

  ps not my toothbrush awkward.

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  (949): ...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail (949): ps not my toothbrush awkward. http://tfl.nu/7ox1
  Replies (2) Good night (676) Bad night (2011)
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  quadriplegic porn is always funny

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  no. no its not

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  (417): quadriplegic porn is always funny (832): no. no its not http://tfl.nu/0tdp
  Replies (38) Good night (1252) Bad night (4636)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.

  (1-214): View more from Texas

  Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.

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  (214): So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat. (1-214): Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic. http://tfl.nu/vioy
  Replies (74) Good night (1618) Bad night (4381)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??

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  (517): last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet?? http://tfl.nu/wkxa
  Replies (39) Good night (1335) Bad night (5522)
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  (831): View more from California

  I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.

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  (831): I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures. http://tfl.nu/n0ak
  Replies (3) Good night (3468) Bad night (529)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...

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  (419): somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky... http://tfl.nu/anut
  Replies (22) Good night (2531) Bad night (3625)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.

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  (910): No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate. http://tfl.nu/lhje
  Replies (4) Good night (2728) Bad night (730)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl

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  (813): Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl http://tfl.nu/zwmh
  Replies (15) Good night (688) Bad night (873)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.

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  (616): i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget. http://tfl.nu/97ka
  Replies (7) Good night (1544) Bad night (472)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja

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  (206): Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja http://tfl.nu/m2bw
  Replies (3) Good night (281) Bad night (885)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Blow job season was short but glorious.

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  (214): Blow job season was short but glorious. http://tfl.nu/338e
  Replies (8) Good night (528) Bad night (252)
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  (805): View more from California

  GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!

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  (805): GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?! http://tfl.nu/avuc
  Replies (4) Good night (384) Bad night (265)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.

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  (410): I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life. http://tfl.nu/oenl
  Replies (1) Good night (201) Bad night (518)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.

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  (832): Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife. http://tfl.nu/f8lt
  Replies (1) Good night (457) Bad night (221)

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