While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
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Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
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Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
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