where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Randomize
