we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
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Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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