So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
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