I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
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You're fucked for turning a no-brainer into a "decision", retard.
Oh don't worry, it gets worse. Tomorrow it looks like you'll have to choose between a grilled cheese sandwich and HIV....idiot.
Some choice... Women like this turn into welfare queens
and, sadly, she will probably choose the jailbird.
I know right... What the fuck do women see in partners who have been CONVICTED of a crime and still stand by them?
Use the force. And by force I mean vagina.