STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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