She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
My breasts were aching with rage.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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