my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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