Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
