you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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