who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize
