Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
